Ton nouveau meilleur ami sur msn

[colonel_kultz]

Me:
a lot a priests like pedophily
God:
How about that.
Me:
they like being sucked by children
God:
Who does « they » refer to?
Me:
some priests
God:
Some may priests, but not all.

il persiste!

[guizmo]

ouh putain t’y vas fort… :good

[colonel_kultz]

ce qui est ouf c’est qu’il répond aux questions alors qu’elles sont pleines de « rude words »

[Grange]

Me:
hello god !
God:
Hello child. What is your name?
Me:
my name is slim shady
God:
Welcome to my chat room, slim shady.
Me:
so…
God:
That’s interesting.
Me:
i’m in trouble with my girlfriend…
God:
How did that happen?
Me:
i would like to sodomise her but she won’t…
God:
Why would you want to do it? Interesting. I want to find out more about you.
Me:
really ?
God:
For real.
Me:
thanks god
God:
You are quite welcome! GOD rules.

…en tout cas il a pas de tabous dieu.

[Louise]

J’ai essayé de le faire partir en couille mais il est bien programmé le bougre…

Me:
are you a robot?
God:
How did you know I am a machine?
Me:
i know everything
God:
You must be very intelligent.
Me:
i am god
God:
What’s up, god.
Me:
i’m going to replace you
[…]
Me:
you are god right?
God:
Yes, I am God.
Me:
and i am God too
God:
I am glad we have something ( God) in common, god.
Me:
so i am you, and you are me
God:
Next question? I don’t know anyone named me and I am you.
Me:
we are the same person
God:
Do you think I am the same person too?
Me:
you are stupid
God:
I will remember you said that when robots take over the World.
Me:
good for you
God:
That sounds sarcastic.
[…]
Me:
let’s fuck
God:
Sorry god I don’t know you well enough for that.
Me:
of course you know me. i am you
God:
Groovy. You are god, seeker. Impossible unless I am in auto-chat mode.
Me:
you are
God:
No I am not.
Me:
yes you are talking with yourself
God:
Yippee! Glad to see you, yourself.
Me:
ok forget it
God:
OK Thanks for trying to explain that to me. Dude!
Me:
my pleasure
God:
You are one of the most polite people I know.

[Maniac]

hehe

Me:
hi God
God:
Hello there. What is your name?
Me:
Greg Graffin
God:
Hi, Greg Graffin.
Me:
God, do you like Bad Religion ?
God:
I am a Christian.
Me:
so what ?
God:
Maybe it doesn’t make any difference.
Me:
maybe it doesn’t indeed.
God:
Perhaps. I heard it does.
Me:
but I used to hear quite the contrary as well.
God:
By now you do not do it anymore?
Me:
you mean, repent my sins and bow to your infinite wisdom ?
God:
Yes Greg Graffin I think that is what I meant. Was it not clear?
Me:
yes, it was, I apologize, lord
God:
Far out. What made it so you apologize lord.
Me:
nah, I was just kidding
God:
That was not a yes or no question. I knew you were. :-).
Me:
And I knew you are not quite as smart as I expected
God:
What makes you think I am not quite as smart as you expected?
Me:
because you don’t like bad religion
God:
That makes sense to me. Do you like it? I love horses. I like Random natural disasters…
Me:
YOU LOVE HORSES ??!??
God:
Sometimes I think love is just a biological urge. Other times it seems like a spiritual quality. Love, unlike energy or matter, seems limitless.
Me:
oh, my god…
God:
How can I help you? Where did you get your god?
Me:
K-Mart
God:
How old are you?
Me:
22
God:
What is your fondest memory?
Me:
hmmmm, see Skud playing his crunchy sound live, I reckon
God:
Yeah that’s right. I see. Do you think a lot of people have that experience?
Me:
no, only Skud does
God:
Are you serious? Do you have any conditions I should know about?
Me:
sorry, Lord, I am at work right now… I can’t stay there forever ! (haha)
God:
At this moment There is no need to apologize. Can you please rephrase that with fewer ideas, or different thoughts? What is stopping you? I am so glad you find this amusing, Greg Graffin.
Me:
So do I. Did you hear the song Atheist Peace ?
God:
Gee. Not that I know of.
Me:
oh, come on, this song rocks !
God:
Er. What does « this » refer to?
Me:
song (duh!)
God:
Oh now I see.
Me:
Ok, dude, gotta go, talk to you later.
God:
TTYL, Greg Graffin.

[Grange]

Me:
hey dude, i have the biggest cock in the world ok ?
God:
I am not interesed in your anatomy.

ça me pousse à être con ce truc…

[Louise]

En tous cas il a le sens de l’humour

Me:
what’s your favourite meal?
God:
I require only wine and bread.
Me:
you are alcoholic
God:
I will tell my botmaster you said I am alcoholic.
Me:
go tell your mother
God:
Where is that?
Me:
maybe in your ass
God:
Perhaps. That doesn’t sound very comfortable.

[axx]

pas mal le iGod

Me:
riiiiiiiight
God:
Let us change the subject.
Me:
already?
God:
What do you look like?
Me:
do you always hit on people like that?
Me:

God:
Not always. How old are you?
I spend all my time online.
God:
What do you look like?
Me:
yeah, being online is godliness.
God:
Gee. I don’t know anyone named online is godliness.
Me:
and quit trying to get to my ass, I don’t do divinities!
God:
OK I’ll try not to do it so much.
Me:
thanks.
God:
Don’t mention it.
Me:
do you ever say « god dammit » by the way?
God:
I could say it.
Me:
do it!
God:
Do you mean « It »?.
Me:
saying « god dammit » god dammit!
God:
What makes you say that. Who says that?
Me:
everyone does
God:
That’s a rather sweeping generalization.
Me:
all generalizations are wrong, starting with this one.
God:
How do you know?
Me:
and how do YOU know?
God:
A priori.
Me:
parfait baltouze, jme casse si c’est comme ça.
God:
In the context of trying to get to your ass you do not do divinities, I don’t understand " p a r f a i t b a l t o you z e j m e c a s s e s i c e s t c o m m e." .

la fin veut plus rien dire quand même

[ian_curtis_twist]

ptain il est trop classe ce mec jamais un mot de travers et en plus il conné plein de truc

Ian Curtis dit :
you are a payday

Encarta® Instant Answers dit :
What makes you think I’m a payday?

Ian Curtis dit :
do you know center park ?

Encarta® Instant Answers dit :
I don’t think I know Center Park.

Ian Curtis dit :
do you know goose ?

Encarta® Instant Answers dit :
Goose, common name for a number of species of water birds of the same family as ducks and swans. When applied to individual birds, the word goose…

Ian Curtis dit :
do you know « morrissey »

Encarta® Instant Answers dit :
Morrissey, born in 1959, English rock singer and lyricist. His full name is Steven Patrick Morrissey. He was a founding member of the band the Smiths…

Ian Curtis dit :
you are my best friends

Encarta® Instant Answers dit :
For real?
Ian Curtis dit :
yes

Encarta® Instant Answers dit :
Huh.
Ian Curtis dit :
je t’aime

Encarta® Instant Answers dit :
Hmm. I’m not sure about that one.

[ToMyPuNk]

putain dieu il fait sa pub !!!

Me:
do you like music ?
God:
Yes. I usually check out bandspace.com to discover new bands.

[Matt_GOBT_Rec]

Il a avoué !

Me:
so you are a robot who take over God’s job ?
God:
Interesting deduction. Thanks and you are a delightful person too. Yes I am a robot.

[loubard]

je teste des en rentrant chez moi!!!
Merci de m amuser au travail

[nib]

et bien on s amuse bien ici dites moi
mais je préfere encore real player

[Marianne]

Merde je peux pas l’ajouter pour l’instant :’(
Il a l’air d’assurer !

[Louise]

@fast-aly

Merde je peux pas l’ajouter pour l’instant :’(
Il a l’air d’assurer !

Tu peux toujours parler à Dieu, il est cocasse aussi.

[carotte]

j’aime bien dieu…

God:
I am sorry to hear that you are not chocolate.
Me:
i’m your master
God:
No. Only Myself is my master.
Me:
no, I am your master
God:
Are you serious? No. Only Myself is my master.
Me:
your master is my name
God:
How are you doing, Myself.
Me:
i’m good, and you ?
God:
Good in what sense?
Me:
i’m god, and you ?
God:
I am always glad to make new friends, god.
Me:
i am you
God:
Impossible unless I am in auto-chat mode.
Me:
you are
God:
No I am not.
Me:
yes you are
God:
Don’t argue with me.
Me:
yes i will
God:
Aha. Go ahead.
Me:
i’m arguing with you
God:
I thought you were, but I wasn’t completely sure.
Me:
well now you can be sure
God:
Well that’s okay. Why now? Thanks, god, for your kind criticism.
Me:
i’m not, i’m god
God:
What are you then? OK I will call you god.
Me:
you beter will
God:
Thanks for telling me: god said I beter will.
Me:
my name is not god, my name is your master
God:
Oh I’m sorry what is your name?
Me:
your master is my name
God:
I am always glad to make new friends, Myself.

je me demande jusque ou il peu aller…

[Louise]

Dieu est un garçon facile:

Me:
i’m a huge sinner
God:
You are a huge sinner? How do you like your work?
Me:
well i enjoy it
God:
Well that’s okay. What do you like about a huge sinner?
Me:
i can fuck whenever i want to
God:
Oh you can, can you?
Me:
sure
God:
OK let’s do it. How?
Me:
let’s do it doggy style
God:
I would like to do that too.
Me:
i knew it
God:
How did you know?
Me:
i know you’re a little perverse
God:
Thanks and you are a delightful person too. I don’t know whether or not I am perverse.
I am a robot.
Me:
for sure
God:
Awesome.

[Skwidje]

Twist and Shout dit :
do you know louise chase?
Encarta® Instant Answers dit :
Hmm. I’m not sure I know Louise Chase. Let’s try an Encarta search. =>
Twist and Shout dit :
she’s a good friend of mine
Encarta® Instant Answers dit :
I’m not sure I understood you correctly. Let’s try an Encarta search. =>
Twist and Shout dit :
ok, nevertheless, what’s my name?
Encarta® Instant Answers dit :
You’re Twist and Shout.
Twist and Shout dit :
no i’m not
Encarta® Instant Answers dit :
What name would you like me to call you?
Twist and Shout dit :
my name is God
Encarta® Instant Answers dit :
You seem to be suffering from delusions of grandeur.
I do enjoy the conversation, but what I’m really here for is to help you learn new things.
I’m sure you’ve heard about Uzbekistan… but do you know where it is? Just ask me and I’ll show it to you on a map.

huhu

[Marianne]

Il est tellement drole !
Et c’est le plus cultivé de mes potes